My life has become really busy. This makes me laugh, reading what I just wrote, because Gosh, my life is Always busy. It is full of, well, LIFE. The highs and the lows, the easy moments of sitting in the shade and listening to voices of children that I love, seeing the laundry blowing on the line in my peripheral vision, savoring a few words from a good book…..and the challenging moments when those children’s voices are all talking at once and they all want my attention and one is fussing and the other is whining and the other is just singing away at the top of his lungs his newest favorite song and I feel like my head is about to explode and sometimes it does.
It’s been getting to me lately. I don’t know why all of a sudden “it” is winning (“it” being the head exploding part). But I won’t let it win because this LIFE, this crazy, noisy, lovely, beautiful life that is mine is so worth it. And it helps to read posts like this one every now and again to remind myself to just relax. To just let myself keep growing. To just sit back and enjoy my children and not worry about if I’m doing right by them so much as just getting in there and doing LIFE with them. They are going to become the people that they choose. And their environment is important. Critical. But a mom too worried about choosing-the-right-books-fitting-in-the-right-classes-while-still-providing-ample-time-to-be-outside-and-getting-their-feet-muddy-and-running-through-the-sprinkler-and-discovering-the-beauty-of-the-world-while-having-enough-social-opportunities-but-not-too-many-that-family-is-overshadowed-and-blah-blah-blah that my brain is on hyper-drive about…..that kind of mom just isn’t that much fun. And above all I want my kids to think of me now and when they are grown as adamantly loving my job as their mom. I want them to know deeply that I CHERISH it. Which means I have to act like it.
So go read that post I mentioned up there and become just a bit more present today….and tomorrow….and…..
